the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
