i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
