did you get engaged???
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
