Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
