My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
It's shark week go big or go home
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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