i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
I just blew my weed a kiss
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
