Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
