Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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