well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
