If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
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