her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Randomize
