No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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