this boner is exhausting
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
