ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
She's the barista slut.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
