If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
