i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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