So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
