Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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