do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
