Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Is it because I queefed?
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Maybe he injected his testicle?
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize