she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
We left the knife in your bed.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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