I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
