so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize
