So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
