Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Randomize