I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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