It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
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