i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
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