Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
