I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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