saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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