did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Randomize