Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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