I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
