Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
