Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Randomize
