sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
