my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
