I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
