hell yes lets make some ravioli
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Randomize
