why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Randomize
