it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
