i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
