no. you can't hotbox the world.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
