I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
