Bisexual people are plain selfish.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
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