you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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