bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
