Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
