I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
